Where did you get a picture of my penis
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
