Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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