Screwed.edu
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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