i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize
