I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
