I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
