what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize