I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
