So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
