You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
