Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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