She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize