I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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