I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
All the doctor said was why
Randomize