I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
His nipple licking is glorious
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