Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
This baby is an asshole
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
