I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
