its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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