can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I just gargled with NyQuil
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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