now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
