weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
