Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
