and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
