i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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