Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
