i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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