Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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