remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
