Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize