butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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