never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
