what if every blade of grass was a penis?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
