Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You can't special order awesome
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
