butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
