he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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