I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
