At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
You ate ashes out of my bong
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
