we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
