Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
