I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
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