Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize