I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
