Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
