hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
