rhymes with "ouble enetration"
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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