I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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