I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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