We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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