Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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