Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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